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Showing posts from July, 2011

The US Debt Crisis: More FAQs Than You Need

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Introduction So. The United States faces the possibility of defaulting on its debts. That’s something that might happen in, oh let’s say, Haiti. And it’s kind of a big deal.  Your Congress and the White House struggle in vain to negotiate a deal that would prevent a default. Democrats and Republicans have repeatedly failed to agree on spending cuts. Not gonna happen. Meanwhile, Tea Party-sponsored lawmakers agree only that taxes are worse than immigrants, closing tax loopholes leads to heroin addiction, and Reagan would never do that, although he did exactly that um, about a dozen times. Oh, and it seems that nearly every bonehead on Capitol Hill is making his or her own debt proposal which don’t stand a chance in hell of doing anything except making underpaid staffers pull all-nighters and have to work on weekends. Thank you for your service, kids. Just the FAQs, Ma’am During these difficult and challenging times, persistent questions about what will happen next continue to swirl

A Few More Things that God Presumably Told Presidential Candidate Rick Perry the Other Day

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Um, Rick. I did not issue a Divine Calling for you to run for the US President. If I make a Divine Calling, you'll know. Ask Anthony Weiner. Michelle Bachman's migrane headaches? Yeah. Now that's Me. Rick, stop invoking My name about natural disasters. They are: Natural disasters. Rick, about your hair: Cut, Cap, and Balance, dude. You wondered "Is Michelle Bachman's husband an anti-gay gay?" "Is Glenn Beck berzerk?" Duh. Tim Pawlenty should worry less about Bachman's migranes and more his upcoming anyeurism. Michelle Bachman: Hates Government Health Care and Gays but has Gay husband and Government Doctor. Neither Sean Hannity nor Bill O'Reilly will join Me in heaven. Brit Hume is a "Maybe." Pawlenty ripping Bachman's record of achievement is fun, right? Just say thanks. I see another bus in Sarah Palin's future. Even I don't understand why people who say Government is the problem want to get a job in the Go